Dreamin' little girl

Dreamin' little girl

Dreamin' little girl

2 years ago

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You spend your entire childhood, face pressed against the window of adolescence, anxiously waiting for the day you will become a full fledged adult. You think your college age and young adult neighbors are cool. Handsome men beep impatiently on their horns, ready for a night on the town. High heels, mini skirts, and tattoos are on your short list of adult must-haves.
If only I could be (insert age) i would finally be happy, you declare on numerous occasions.
Until the day you finally reach the promised land of grownups, a land glittering with disposable men (and women), deep pockets, and teeth baring fun as depicted in old tobacco ads.
Only the promised land is filled with manna; bills and student loan payments higher than a month's salary. Friday nights are spent alone watching reruns and romantic comedies because even as pretty, smart, and funny as you are; you cannot get a date.
Being an adult is hard, filled with mundane and difficult life choices. Dating men who are more than difficult or elusive just to avoid being alone. Getting married to the love of your life only to find it lonelier on the other side on some days. Holidays are increasingly difficult as you have less in common with family members and suddenly have to split your time to make both sides happy.
Marriage is harder than anyone ever said, compromises become stale. The pillows are soaked at night after having the same fight but still you smile.
You go to work, your idealistic hardhat still planted firmly on your head, determined to change the world. The bright smile on your face starts to fade, the light from within flickers with uncertainty, it gets harder and harder to get out of bed. You toll on because ends have to be met, and you will not waste a pricey education on the desires of your heart.
Now you wish you could back to that dreamin' little girl and tell her to slow down and treasure the moments; to enjoy being young with few responsibilities and the world in your hand. You don't want to disappoint her, you don't want her to think her pining was all for naught. Life can be hard but it can also be very beautiful. So you make sure to tell her to go after her dreams even when her parents and college advisers tell her no.
You tell her life is too short to simply dream, you have to live.

Brenda Fadeyibi
Brenda Fadeyibi
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